Having a plan for long term care for aging parents

Transcript of Interview: “Having a plan for long term care for aging parents”

Mike Barnes:

We’re always getting questions in the group of Parenting Aging Parents about, “Okay, what do I do because we’re just planning ahead? We want to look for extended care, long-term care, however you want to describe it. But where do I start? What do I do? Who do I talk to?” So many people have questions and don’t know where to turn. We are going to bring it to you today. Mickey Batsell is a senior care consultant as well as someone who actually goes and trains people who are in the senior industry. So, you’ve got a lot of experience, Mickey. We’re glad for you to be here.

Kim Barnes:

And I think that the first thing is, as we’re hearing from people who are wondering how to do this, it’s at least good that they’re asking, right? Because I think the first thing that’s so important about thinking about how we are going to care for our parents for the long term is where do we start and what kind of plan can we put in place?

Mickey Batsell:

Yeah, it’s a very difficult situation because for many people, it’s the first time they’ve ever been kind of thrust into the firing line. It’s a subject that a lot of the financial planners or consultants that are out there helping clients don’t really know or understand, so they’re a little embarrassed to even bring it up. You’ve got to have somebody that knows what they’re talking about.

Kim Barnes:

So let’s just start with talking about why it’s so important to have a plan and to have thought through these things before you actually need it.

Mickey Batsell:

Well, it’s important to know if something happens to mom or dad, or to you or your spouse, are you going to be able to handle it by yourself? Most likely not. Where do you go to get the kind of help that you need? Some of it involves volunteering, but most of it is going to involve somebody whose profession it is, so they have to get compensated for helping out, and it can become pretty expensive.

Mike Barnes:

We often hear people avoid the conversation about long-term care and long-term care insurance because the first thing that comes to their mind is a nursing home.

Mickey Batsell:

Well, a nursing home is a place that people really don’t want to go to, and it’s usually the last resort. Most extended care takes place in the home, and most of it is provided by family members or friends. It’s exhausting, and you need some help; you need a break. I had a situation with a client that lives in Colorado Springs, and she was trying to take care of her husband. Just about three weeks ago, she had a heart attack from all the stress. When I saw her earlier this year, I told her she needed to get some help because it was just too much stress. Well, it took an event like that for her to realize that they had policies in place that they could have been using, but they were afraid they were going to spend it down. It’s a tough situation, but you’ve got to have that conversation.

Kim Barnes:

You mentioned long-term care insurance. I think a lot of people are confused between long-term care insurance and long-term care because you don’t go to the same people for both, am I correct?

Mickey Batsell:

That’s correct because, for someone to acquire a funded long-term care insurance policy, it has to be sold by a licensed insurance agent. Long-term care can come from a home care agency, a spouse, or a child, but those don’t require any particular licenses unless you’re working for a home care agency, then the agency has to be licensed appropriately. The big difference when you’re talking about a home situation is that there’s professional care, which is skilled care provided by doctors, nurses, and people who have a medical background or license, and non-professional, non-skilled care, which is people helping with everyday chores, dressing, and those sorts of things. It’s completely different from medical care.

Kim Barnes:

So, as the adult child, we’re thinking ahead and trying to plan and be prepared. What’s the first thing we need to do to start creating that long-term care plan?

Mickey Batsell:

I think evaluating your family situation is probably the first step. Have the conversation. If something should happen to you, what is your plan in terms of assistance? Who’s going to help you? Many people assume their son or daughter will take care of them, but the reality is their children might have careers and responsibilities that prevent them from doing so. You need to have that conversation and be realistic about what is possible.

Mike Barnes:

So, I guess the first step is actually having that conversation with your family to find out what the wishes might be for the parent but also the availability of the children. Is that kind of what you’re talking about?

Mickey Batsell:

Yes, that’s helpful because, in every family, children have certain skill sets. There will be one that’s a natural caregiver, while others may have nothing to do with it. It’s important to identify those roles.

Kim Barnes:

You went through some caregiving with your mother, correct? Besides just on the business side, you know from personal experience about the time and the money that it takes.

Mickey Batsell:

Yes, and it was particularly challenging because I grew up in Phoenix, Arizona, where my mother lived in the same house they built in 1958. My dad passed away in 2000, and mom lived by herself. When her health started deteriorating, I was in Austin, Texas, my brother was in Colorado Springs, and my sister was in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. I spent time going back and forth, particularly in the last six months of her life, helping out. We didn’t have the right kind of opportunity for her because her health wouldn’t let her qualify for a long-term care policy. We did something three years ago that saved us: her home was paid for but had grown in value, so we did a reverse mortgage and had those funds available to help pay for the care. Home care runs between $20 to $28 an hour, and we had to have somebody in the home for about three months, costing around $22,000 to $23,000 a month.

Kim Barnes:

Wow, that’s a lot.

Mickey Batsell:

Yes, it hurts to write a check that big every month. Even if you can do it in the short term, it’s hard to sustain.

Kim Barnes:

So, having a plan in place is crucial.

Mickey Batsell:

Yes, you’ve got to have a plan. For the short term, you might manage for a few months, but in the long term, you need a sustainable solution. I had to tell my mom we could manage until the end of the year, but after that, she would need to qualify for Medicaid, which she didn’t want. We found a home with nine residents, each with a private room and bathroom, and an outdoor area, which was more affordable.

Kim Barnes:

So, knowing there are different types of care options is important. Is there a difference between a long-term care plan and long-term care insurance?

Mickey Batsell:

Yes, the difference is you need to have a plan in place. The long-term care policy may be part of the solution, but it’s not the plan itself. The policy is a safeguard and a method to help fund the plan.

Mike Barnes:

So, creating a long-term plan involves discussions with your parents, understanding their financial abilities, and putting together a written plan.

Mickey Batsell:

Yes, you want to put the plan together while everyone is healthy. You don’t want to wait until you’re up against the wall with limited choices. It’s important to get input from your parents to ensure you’re doing what they want.

Mike Barnes:

What should people do if their parents are in independent living now but will need more care in the future?

Mickey Batsell:

First, evaluate what resources are available. Understand the difference between skilled care, provided by medical professionals, and home care, which is non-medical. You may need someone to help with cooking and chores, even if it’s just for a few hours a day to give the primary caregiver a break.

Kim Barnes:

Are they looking more for insurance or ways to fund future care? The financial piece is a significant factor.

Mickey Batsell:

Yes, it’s the driving force. You need to know what funds are available, how to access them, and understand the tax consequences. There are a lot of moving parts.

Mike Barnes:

What type of person should they talk to? A financial planner, an insurance agent?

Mickey Batsell:

They need to talk to someone with experience. Look for certifications like Certified Senior Advisor (CSA) or Certified in Long-Term Care (CLTC). These designations indicate they have the training and knowledge to help with long-term care planning.

Kim Barnes:

What if something has already happened to mom or dad, and they need long-term care now? Who do they talk to?

Mickey Batsell:

There are home care agencies, some franchised and some independently operated. It’s an entire industry. If it’s a medical need, talk to doctors. For home care, look for reputable agencies.

Kim Barnes:

This conversation shows that there’s a lot of confusion and moving parts. It’s important to start with a conversation with your parents and siblings to get on the same page.

Mike Barnes:

Yes, if you have other topics you’d like us to talk to experts about, let us know here on Parenting Aging Parents.

*This transcript is auto-generated. Please excuse any typos or mistakes